Home

There is a sign that hangs above my bed in my parents’ house that reads, “Home is Where your Mom is”.  My mom put it up sometime after I left for college.  I laugh every time I see it because, well, you have to know my mom.  She’s a little possessive of us kids.  But it does beg the question of what home is.  Since leaving my parents' house, I have lived in four different states—Utah, New York, Illinois and now back in California.  It is amazing that you can call so many different places home—and even more amazing that I can miss each one so poignantly.  I missed the Pacific Ocean for years, and now miss the Rocky Mountains and the New York skyline.  I miss the feeling of being in these places, the feeling of home and familiarity and community.  I miss the apartments and houses I lived in and the people and experiences I loved in those places.

My most recent place of residence was Chicago—and it is still amazing to me that it felt so much like home.  If you would have told me at 20 that I would live in the Midwest at 30, I wouldn’t have believed you (I pretty much thought the country consisted of 2 coasts and nothing much in the middle).  If you would have told me 2 years ago when we moved to Chicago that I would love it so much, I also wouldn’t have believed you.  But it’s true.  I loved it and it felt like home.  Even though California was always the plan and my parents and every one of my siblings live here (plus three of Chris’s), it was hard to leave Chicago/Evanston (we lived in both).  I thought New York was the only really great city, but I was wrong.  Chicago’s coolness took me entirely by surprise.  We got to live by family for the first time in years, and we made friends that felt like family.  We had Ella there.  We spent a year preparing for her and a year just marveling at her.  We had a lot of adventures and created a lot of memories. A piece of my heart will always be there.

Here is a list of just some of the things I will miss:

·      Sunday dinners and family prayer at the Ward house

·      Fireworks at Navy Pier

·      Saturday morning walks to the Farmer’s Market in Evanston

·      So many friends who are new moms—we’ve lunched and learned together

·      The North Shore Book Club—pretty much as good as it gets

·      The French doors and wood floors of our apartment in Evanston

·      The view of the sailboats on Lake Michigan from our downtown skyrise apartment

·      The amazing museums in Chicago

·      Friends from so many phases of my life all magically moving to Chicago

·      Ella’s fan club (she was one beloved baby)

·      The miracle of 4 of the Ward siblings living there for 4 months

·      The North Shore 1^st Ward Primary singing “Scripture Power” at the top of their lungs

·      Concerts and picnics in Grant Park

·      Going out to breakfast at the lake home in Lake Geneva

·      Staying up way too late talking to my sister-in-law Marci (usually while all the Wards fell asleep in the first five minutes of a movie)

·      The tree-lined streets and beautiful homes of Evanston

·      An easy social life courtesy of our social planners, Caitlin and Jeff

·      The gut-splitting laughter of Chris, his brother Brent, and their dad

·      Doing Chris’ Compliment Club at our friends’ birthday parties

·      The babaganoosh at Pomegranate

·      The view of Chicago from the women’s bathroom in the Hancock Building

·      Realizing that there are few better people on the planet than my mother and father-in-law

·      Many, many walks along beautiful Lake Michigan

·      All the visitors to the Chateau Ward who we convinced of Chicago’s awesomeness (except for maybe Linda who came on the coldest day ever)

I guess the good part about loving all these places and calling them home is that it gives me confidence that this new place will become home too—that with time we’ll build a rich, full life here as well. 

At least it’s clear where my parents consider my home.  This was the sight I saw at the airport flying into Los Angeles.  I guess home is where your mom is.